F cked on the Floor
by M. Monster
Summary: He should have caught on by the drink names; A little Dick'll Do, Kiss on the Lips, Foreplay on Neutral Ground, Kiss Me Slow, Screaming Multiple Orgasms on the Beach, Cock'n'Balls, Naked on the Bathroom Floor, and F*cked on the Floor. Desmond/Shaun, smut


**Fucked on the Floor  
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* * *

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"Oh my god, _Shaun_," Rebecca hissed furiously, tugging on the sleeve of Shaun's shirt. He yanked it from her grip. She was using _charcoal_ for chrissake. "Oh my god that's the _bartender_, Shaun,"

And Shaun looked up from his easel at her, then around said easel at the door where their model was waddled in, clad in a white sheet that they normally draped their bodies across. Shaun shifted his eyes to the left, confirming that their teacher _was_indeed wearing the robe, amusing himself with the pockets ("there are _so many_,").

"Oh fuck, Shaun, he's fucking _built_," Rebecca gasped. The bartender-come-model spoke in low tones to the high professor, who was now playing with his dreadlocks. Bartender looked exasperated, and Goodbody got a look of realization and apologized profusely.

Shaun squeaked when bartender turned and Shaun got a clear view of the man's back. and his bloody arms, and _god_.

"Oh _mama_," Rebecca said, and she whistled low. "I would tap that _so hard_, _so many times_,"

"Are those _tattoos_?" Shaun asked, and he reached to the side of his chair for his horse. No easel this class, he thought.

"_Every day_ I would tap that." Rebecca continued. "Who thought he was hiding a body like _that_ underneath his shirts? God, no _wonder_ he moonlights as a model."

"Look at those _shoulders_," Shaun said appreciatively. Rebecca stared at the man's back and gasped as he dropped the sheet to lay it across the table.

"Look at that _ass_," She said gleefully. Shaun looked at mentioned ass and shifted himself in his pants. Goodbody slapped the bartender on the shoulder and laughed, and he stood in the center of the class, raising his arms imperially, as if to part the Red Sea or to catch the attention of his subjects. It was ruined by a wide yawn.

"Class! Good to see you here again this evening. We have _thoroughly_ studied the female body," He leered a bit, and Shaun remembered how the last model- an older woman, Catherine or something- was giving Bill _eyes_ the entire session. "We will begin with the male form. This is Desmond Miles," He moved to his desk where his own art pad was set up and sat in his chair, spinning in a lazy circle before halting that action abruptly, looking ill and awed. "_Woah_. Sorry, Desmond Miles, age twenty...something."

"Three." Desmond offered.

"That's what I said. Get out your shit, kids, and Des, if you could do a lazy-Adam pose... the one in the Sistine chap- yes, excellent, bro. Get drawing."

Shaun was staring at Desmond slack-jawed. He was _gorgeous_, and Shaun wasn't the only student staring. God, he had a _perfect_ view of the man, and Shaun was instantly erect. He shifted his horse across his thighs, flushed as he pressed his stick of charcoal to his paper, his eyes taking in _all_ of the man- the hair on his chest, the soft prick resting in its bed of curls, the toned thighs. Even his _feet_ were arousing.

"Dibs," He heard Rebecca say quietly even though her lips didn't move. Shaun shot her a glare and she smirked wryly.

"_Cunt_," He seethed through clenched teeth. Her smirk warped to a leering grin

Shaun turned his face back to Desmond's and met the bartender's eye. He flushed when he was on the recieving end of a slow wink and Shaun's eyes shot back down to his sketch. He peered at the fit form from the top of his pad. He adjusted himself in his trousers again.

At the end of class, as he packed away his supplies, he watched as Desmond was swarmed by women and offered phone number after phone number. His breath caught as the man _smiled_. It was _charming_. The bartender-come-model's eyes met Shaun's again and he beamed. Shaun left the room from the back, face flaming. When Rebecca trolled over to his car looking in_ordinately_ pleased with herself, Shaun's scowl deepened.

"_I_ get to meet up with Des at his bar tomorrow. It's called Shakespeare's. How weird is that for a bar?" She said, bubbly and bright, and Shaun wanted to crash her half of the car. Or stab her.

"Lovely." He said stiffly.

"I tried to cop a feel. He just... disappeared as soon as somebody reached for his ass. Creepy ninja skills."

"Fascinating." Shaun muttered. He eyed the tree they passed contemplatively.

"He's _so gorgeous_. Maybe you can come with me," She teased and Shaun was, at that point, _seriously considering_ murder. As he dropped Rebecca off, she waved sarcastically and smirked again.

"I'll call you and tell you how our..._date_ goes," She said and Shaun hissed again, speeding down the road after he glared daggers in Rebecca's back.

He needed a drink.

* * *

Shaun was painting the cityscape rather absently when Rebecca called. It wasn't even eleven, he assumed she would still be on her _date_ (the word was a beetle in his mouth). He put the phone on speaker.

"_So the first thing I asked him was why he went into modelling, right? 'Cause I figured that was a safe enough question, right?_" Shaun didn't respond, only moved his brush slowly. "_Right_?" She repeated.

Shaun gave a laborious sigh. "Right."

"_Right. So anyway, he said it was a favor for Goodbody and it offered decent cash._"

"So he's a greedy little sod." Shaun said. Rebecca sighed this time.

"_No, Shaun, let me finish. So anyway, he makes me a drink, without having to ask for one. I don't even remember mentioning what I like, and he just freaking made it for me._"

"It isn't difficult to notice if a woman wants an appletini." Shaun sneered. Rebecca laughed.

"_It was a Sex on the Beach. But listen! So I'm flirting with him the whole time and every time I tried to reach out and touch his shoulder he did that freaky disappearing act again. He was right under my hand then he was at the other end of the bar._" Rebecca sounded frustrated and Shaun grinned.

"So you scared off another man- nothing new, Becks." She huffed angrily.

"_Shut up, Shaun! So I'm flirting with him more and I'm anything but subtle. I was pretty much saying I want to have intercourse with you._"

"Oh you big slut." Shaun said flatly. "So what did you do with him. You better not be calling from his bed right now, I will fucking flay you," He threatened, pausing, ill at the thought.

"_I'm not that cruel,_" Rebecca defended. Shaun said nothing. "_Anyway, so he mixed me a drink-_"

"And? You already said that."

"_And that's it. I tipped him and went home with the numbers of a couple men at the bar. He didn't even look at my tits,_" She wailed at this point. "_We talked boys the entire evening, Shaun! He was pointing out men who were interested in me the entire time! Who wouldn't want this?_"

"How unfortunate." Shaun said, but he didn't mean it.

"_I think it's because it was the first time I met up with him. I'm going to try again tonight. I will cop a feel._"

"Good night, Rebecca." Shaun said tersely. He hung up and dropped the pallate, moving out of the studio and leaving his apartment. He needed a drink.

* * *

"Ah, hey," Desmond said, smiling at Shaun as he approached the bar. _Bollocks._ "Shaun, right?"

"Yes." Shaun said tersely after a moment, standing at the bar, crossing his arms on the smooth, highly polished wood. Desmond made some alcoholic concotion in an old-fashioned glass, sliding it to Shaun.

"Here. Try it," Desmond said, smiling in that disarming way. Shaun lifted it and sniffed cautiously.

"The hell is this?" He asked, raising and eyebrow and setting it back on the bar. Desmond's grin morphed into something positively wicked.

"A little dick." Shaun flushed, and scowled. Desmond beamed.

"Excuse me." He said stiffly, sliding the drink away as if the very name offended him. Which it did. "I am _not_ going to drink this." Some punk passed by and snatched the drink.

Desmond sighed and looked a little fallen before mixing another drink in a cocktail glass. He offered it to Shaun as if it were a peace offering. He offered a small smile as Shaun accepted the drink.

"And what is _this_?" He asked, though the drink did look very appealing. Shaun stirred the syrup into the beverage as Desmond's grin became something sultry and he spoke in a low, sexy voice and leaned closer to Shaun.

"A kiss on the lips," He breathed, and Shaun flushed again and busied himself with his drink.

"Not very alcoholic." He said to change the subject. Desmond sighed.

"Finish that one first," he ordered, and he conjured another drink with his bartending magic. He saw vodka disappear in the glass with more fruity things. He offered the drink and took the empty cocktail glass from Shaun. Shaun sipped the drink.

"It's good," Shaun admitted, and Desmond smiled widely again.

"Foreplay on the Neutral Ground." Desmond leered. Shaun sipped the drink and turned his back to Desmond, resting his elbows on the bar. Desmond leaned forward next to Shaun.

"So how did you get into art?" He asked, breath tickling Shaun's neck. Shaun shifted and stirred his drink as a distraction.

"Just a hobby." He explained shortly. Desmond laughed and stood straight to roll up his long sleeves. Shaun caught the typography on his arms out of the corner of his eye. Desmond noticed.

"You like?" He asked with another charming grin. Shaun flushed a bit, _yes_ playing through his mind and coupled with _I want to lick the letters_. _God this is so bloody awkward_.

"What's it say?" He asked instead. He took another drink of Foreplay.

Desmond traced the letters on his left arm. _Emergo_ in basic medieval typography. Shaun felt his mouth dry as he caught the words _cit omnia_ Desmond's his right arm. "This one reads _luctor et emergo_, I struggle and emerge."

"I hope that has a deeper meaning," Shaun asked, his fingers reaching out to trace the letters before he knew what he was doing. Desmond shivered and Shaun took his hand back and polished off the rest of his alcohol.

"It does," Desmond said quietly, though he looked like he wanted to say more. "The other arm," he showed the right arm. "says _amor vincit omnia_, love conquers all." Shaun wanted to trace those letters too, but kept his hands to himself.

"Poetic," Shaun said breathlessly, somehow allowing his fingers to get away and trace the other arm. "Do you have any more tattoos?" He blurted.

Desmond grinned again. "Well you have seen me completely naked. Should I get more?" He asked, taking Shaun's hands in his and tracing circles on Shaun's wrist. Shaun was unsure if his light-headedness was due to the alcohol or to the fact that he was in close promximity to Desmond.

"I think you should get your back done. Something as gorgeous as you," _Fuck_ that's the alcohol talking. Desmond smiled anyway.

"A full canvas?" Desmond prompted, proffering another drink he made out of nowhere. He pressed it into Shaun's palm and his hands curled protectively around the glass.

Shaun took a sip. He made a face, it wasn't as fruity as the previous drinks. "Yes," He said after he swallowed. "Yes. Just as long as it isn't a tiger or a dragon or something equally tacky."

"I'll make sure it has your seal of approval," Desmond said seriously, and Shaun nodded. He took another deep pull from his cup.

"What's this drink?"

"Kiss me slowly." Desmond said, and suddenly his expression became sultry again, making Shaun's heart stutter and his breath catch. And he was _about to_, but then he remembered _Rebecca_, and how that awful twat had her sights _set_ on Desmond and he was- he couldn't just _interfere_.

"I-I should go," Shaun said, slapping a couple bills on the counter. "I'll see you," Face flaming, Shaun fled from the bar, Desmond's _w-wait_ fading in the buzz of bar conversation.

* * *

Shaun was painting again almost a week later when Rebecca called him. It wasn't even nine. He put her on speaker again.

"What," He asked tiredly.

"_You skipped class._" She said.

"Oh, was that today? I forgot." Shaun lied.

"_You fucking liar._"

"Go away Rebecca," Shaun said.

"_But Shau-_" Click.

Shaun painted in silence.

* * *

The next evening Rebecca kept calling and would not take Shaun's voicemail as an answer. By the seventeenth call, Shaun picked up, snarling.

"_What_,"

"_You didn't tell me you went to see Desmond at the bar._" She said immediately. Shaun sighed deeply.

"I _didn't_, I went to get _shitfaced_." He defended.

"_You're fucking lying to me again! God he spent the **whole time** reminiscing about how you touched his arms and how he only modelled in class this week because he thought you would be there. He flirted with you using **drinks **you dense idiot! You got farther with him than all the women in class **combined**._"

Shaun, feeling both bitter and victorious, let a smirk crawl onto his face. "Take _that_you nasty bitch."

"_Shaun._" She said, reprimanding. Shaun muttered an apology. Rebecca would not have it. She continued, still in near hysterics. "_He gave you a Screaming Orgasm!_"

"He did no such thing!" Shaun argued. "He gave me a little dick and foreplay on neutral ground!"

Rebecca made a strangled noise. "_I am glaring at you over the phone._"

"Rebecca, I'm sorry, I know you wanted him so I-"

"_Save it. I want your ass at Shakespeare's in ten minutes or I'm raping Desmond._" Rebecca said shortly. Shaun felt his tense shoulders relax. "_**Ten minutes**,_" She reminded him sternly.

* * *

"Shaun!" Desmond looked elated when he approached the bar. "I-I missed you last class," He spoke shyly and gazed at Shaun from under his lashes. "Oh, one minute!"

Shaun resisted the urge to drum his fingers on the polished bartop as Desmond whirled away behind the bar adding and shaking until he deemed the beverage ready. Desmond poured and handed the highball glass to Shaun looking pleased and amused. "From your friend-Becca I think it was."

Shaun sipped the drink before taking a larger swallow. _Suitably alcoholic_. "And it is?"

"Screaming multiple orgasms on the beach." Shaun choked and Desmond laughed lightly, leaning on the bar (which flexed his biceps. _God_ he looked good in short sleeves). He wiped his face with the back of his hand and spoke dryly.

"How kind of her," He said. Desmond beamed.

"She bought you more drinks, also. I think she's paying your tab for the evening because some of these are pretty alcoholic." Desmond said seriously. Shaun knew_exactly_ what the bint was planning. He took another swallow and made a face. "Where were you last class?"

"I was nursing my poor, sick cat." Shaun lied.

Desmond rested his chin in his palm and smiled wryly. "Becca said you would say that. She also said you don't have a cat." Shaun cursed and set the glass down on the bar, folding his arms and leaning forward.

"I _meant_ to say," Shaun began suavely, "I was nursing my poor, sick grandmother." He amended. Desmond let out a breathy laugh and gave Shaun a fond smile.

"You are so full of shit." He said, and He took the nearly empty highball glass and set it under the bar. He began his magical pouring of vodka and fruity whatevers into a different highball.

"Another one of Rebecca's gifts?" Shaun sneered and Desmond's lips quirked in a smile. "She would pick something with _vodka_. Can barely abide the stuff."

"Has to be fruity, right?" Desmond asked, peering up at Shaun before returning to his work. He gave Shaun the glass and a coaster. "Enjoy."

Shaun muttered something before taking a quick sip. He made a face. "I have never had fruit _burn_ down my throat before."

"Why thank you." Desmond said sweetly, and Shaun glared at him before taking another draw.

"Wasn't a compliment, pet," He said dryly. Desmond laughed again. "What's this one called?"

"Cock'n Balls." He responded and only through _sheer willpower_ did Shaun _not_ spray his drink out all over the bar.

"Blimey, who in the bloody hell names these things?" He asked, setting the glass on the coaster. Desmond leaned on the bar again.

"It varies. Some are named because of what's put in them, some are named because they'll fuck you up. Some are just amusing." He explained. Shaun held his head in his hands for a moment.

"Pass on this drink. The vodka is not sitting well with me." Shaun said, and Desmond let his hand squeeze Shaun's arm affectionately before whisking the glass away and replacing it with a small coffee. Shaun raised an eyebrow but sipped at it anyway. It wasn't long before another glass was pushed in his face, smaller than the rest.

"This one will kick your ass." Desmond told him seriously, and Shaun took a cautious sip of the stuff before a dizzy feeling washed over him.

"What is in this?" Shaun asked, taking another slow sip. "Is that cinnamon?"

"It's naked on the bathroom floor. Named because that is where you'll end up if left to your own devices." Desmond leaned closer to Shaun over the bar and Shaun's eyes flickered to Desmond's lips. _God._

"You wouldn't leave me alone in the bathroom, would you, Desmond?" Shaun asked softly, alcohol buzzing pleasantly through his system. Desmond let his finger slide up Shaun's arm and he laced his fingers through the ones holding the glass.

"Of course not, Shaun, I'd never leave you alone in the bathroom, much less naked. I would bring you back to my lair." Desmond said pleasantly, his eyes as warm and sultry as his voice. Shaun felt a twitch in his pants. "I'd rather you naked on _my_ floor."

Shaun's breathing hitched and he leaned closer to Desmond. "Oh?" He raised the glass (with Desmond's hand) and took another healthy dose of drink. He licked his lips and Desmond mimed the action.

"Yes." Desmond said, so close his breath fogged the glass in their shared grip. "You know, Shaun, I actually had a plan,"

"A plan?" Shaun prompted, and Desmond nodded, taking the nearly empty glass from Shaun's grip.

"Yes," He said, leaning closer to Shaun again, their faces scant inches apart. "I was going to seduce you to naked on the bathroom floor, and then proposition you to one last drink," His eyes were lidded and gorgeous and Shaun licked his lips again. Desmond's eyes followed the action.

"And- what was the last drink, gorgeous?" Shaun asked, feeling pleasent and confident with the alcohol. His hand moved from nowhere to trace _emergo_ on Desmond's arm.

"Fucked on the floor," Desmond said against Shaun's lips. Shaun gasped and Desmond pressed a kiss to his lips lightly. "Let's go," He said, and he led Shaun around the bar and up the stairs hidden in a corner in the back to the apartment above the bar.

* * *

Desmond pushed Shaun into his bed, kissing the back of his neck and trailing down his spine, pulling off his trousers and gripping Shaun's prick in a firm hand. Shaun arched when Desmond licked the small of his back, nipping lightly.

"Oh, Desmond," Shaun gasped, and Desmond puffed a breath against Shaun's flushed skin.

"Don't come," Desmond said, kissing the top of his arse and Shaun's breath hitched. "Don't come, not yet,"

He felt a tongue lick him, and then a lubed finger twirled around his hole. "Oh, god, Des, please," Shaun begged and the tongue lapped eagerly at his sphincter as the finger pressed inside. Shaun gave a strangled groan and dropped his head onto his arms. Desmond squeezed the fist gripping Shaun's cock.

Desmond's tongue entered him next to a finger and Shaun moaned. "God, god, yes, Des, please, yes," It was all babble, nonsensical words strung together, and Desmond simply hummed in agreement, eliciting cry after cry from Shaun.

He pressed another finger inside of Shaun next to the clever tongue. Desmond began to slowly stroke Shaun, and when he stopped fucking Shaun with his tongue, he simply breathed into Shaun's shoulder, "Don't come, baby, don't come," And Shaun would release a strangled, begging _please, please_, and Desmond would ignore him and press a third finger inside of Shaun with more lube before lapping at the hole and sucking oh-so-gently. He scissored his hands and let his tongue tease inside of Shaun.

"God, please let me come, Des, please, please," Shaun begged, and Desmond squeezed painfully right at that.

"No. No, not until I'm deep inside your tight ass. God I wanted you when I saw you in class with fucking Goodbody. Laying back and thinking of England did _nothing_for the boner I got thinking of you. I had to masturbate in the bathroom twice before I could begin to _think_ of going home." He kissed up Shaun's spine and spoke directly into Shaun's ear. Shaun was nearly melted, pushing his hips back onto the fingers inside of him.

"Please, please Desmond, fuck me, god, want you inside me," Shaun begged, alcohol making him wanton (that was his story, he was sticking to it), and he couldn't _last_ with Desmond's fucking teasing.

"Soon, baby. God, soon. Now, fuck." Desmond's hands left his body and Shaun moaned, arse in the air demanding attention, hands clenching uselessly on the dark quilt his cock was leaking profusely on. "You ready?" Desmond asked, panting, close against Shaun's neck.

"_Yes_, god, I've been ready-" And Shaun cut off when he felt the heat of Desmond's prick against him and _fuck he was pressing inside_ and it felt huge, it always did, and Shaun was panting as hard as Desmond was, arching his back to get closer-to get farther, it didn't even matter.

"Tight. God, tight, yes," Desmond hissed, biting Shaun's neck and pushing himself closer to Shaun until he was nearly glued to Shaun. He began thrusting in earnest, and Shaun couldn't even see anymore with the bolts of pleasure Desmond was eliciting, and then Desmond wrapped his fist around Shaun's dick again and Shaun was blind to anything but pleasure.

"Yes, yes, yes," He panted rythymically, and Desmond was marking Shaun with hickeys all over his shoulders, his neck, and he spontaneously thought, bland for a brief moment, that Rebecca would have a _field day_ if Shaun didn't die from this fantastic and agonizing glory.

"Want you to come, want you to come and then I'm going to come inside you. You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Desmond grunted and Shaun uttered incoherent cries as he was fisted frantically, and then Desmond fucked him _just so_ and he was fucking coming, all over Desmond's goddamn quilt and his hand and Desmond took his hands and forced Shaun deeper in the covers, thrusting harder and faster.

"_Shaun_," He gasped and he fucking _came_ inside of Shaun, groaning like a whore just as he promised, and he collapsed over Shaun, panting, hips still rolling minutely and absently.

And then Shaun felt uncomfortably hot and sticky with come smearing on his belly and a sweaty (and incredibly attracive) man pressed against his spine, pulling his softening prick out of Shaun.

"Nngh," He said.

"Fuck," Desmond said, and he bit Shaun's neck again for good measure, because he did need _one more_ mark. _Nnnngh_ Shaun said again. "I'll get something to clean up with, I'll be back," Desmond said, and Shaun turned onto his back to watch Desmond disappear from the room.

When Desmond returned he carried a wet terrycloth that he used to worship Shaun's body with more, gentle and adding kisses to every area he cleaned, and Shaun eyed as _emergo_ and _omnia_ praised him more.

"That a new tattoo?" Shaun asked tiredly and he brought up a hand to trace the colored skin on Desmond's back. Desmond nodded and kissed Shaun's hip.

"Yes, I got it after that first night you were at the bar." Desmond admitted. "It's a striking eagle. Not too tacky, right?" He offered Shaun another charming grin and kissed his lips tiredly.

Shaun sneered without rancor. "It's horribly tacky, pet." Desmond turned and Shaun traced the eagle's talons softly. It was obviously still a fresh tattoo, and Shaun found the lotion (which was _actually_ the lube they had used. Oops) and spread it across the skin delicately. "I suppose I can still keep you, it isn't like it's a wolf." Desmond laughed and inhaled sharply at the kiss Shaun placed on his neck.

"You're too kind." Desmond said and he turned to press his chest against Shaun's, kissing him thoroughly.

"I know," Shaun said. Desmond kissed him again, pulling Shaun close and holding him there. Shaun's phone rang, and he knew instinctively it was Rebecca. He ignored it, and inhaled the scent of Desmond's pillow. "You'll need my seal of approval for anything else going on this body though."

"I think I can do that," Desmond said. Shaun tried not to smile.

"Then we should work out beautifully," He said quietly, and Desmond allowed a wide smile to bloom across his face.**  
**

* * *

**Drinks mentioned/used:**

A Little Dick'll Do - old-fashioned glass  
_2 oz George Dickel Tennessee whiskey  
3 - 5 splashes Mountain Dew citrus soda  
_Pour the George Dickel into the glass. Top off with Mountain Dew, and serve.

Kiss on the Lips - cocktail glass  
_1 - 1 1/2 oz peach schnapps  
4 - 6 oz frozen mango mix  
1 tbsp grenadine syrup  
_The mango mix should be blended with crushed ice firstly with the schnapps. Pour the schnapps and mango mix into a cocktail glass with the grenadine already placed at the bottom.

Foreplay on the Neutral Ground - hurricane glass  
_8 oz Absolut vodka  
4 oz Midori melon liqueur  
12 oz pineapple juice  
12 oz cranberry juice  
ice  
_Fill glasses with ice. Mix absolut, midori, pineapple juice and cranberry juice in a decanter. Pour over ice and serve. Makes several.

Kiss Me Slow - old-fashioned glass  
_4 oz white rum  
2 oz triple sec  
1 oz lemon juice  
_Stir ingredients together into an old-fashioned glass, and serve.

Screaming Multiple Orgasms on the Beach - highball glass  
_1 1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur  
1/2 oz triple sec  
1 oz Midori melon liqueur  
1 oz Malibu coconut rum  
1 oz DeKuyper Peachtree schnapps  
2 oz club soda  
_Fill glass 1/2 full with ice. Add all liquors and speed shake. Top with club soda.

Cock 'n Balls - highball glass  
_5 oz raspberry lemonade  
1 oz Smirnoff Green Apple Twist vodka  
1 oz Smirnoff Watermelon Twist vodka  
_Pour the raspberry lemonade into a highball glass with several ice cubes. Add the vodka's by stirring in as you pour, and serve.

Naked on the Bathroom Floor - old-fashioned glass  
_1/2 oz 1800 Tequila  
1/2 oz Rumple Minze peppermint liqueur  
1/2 oz Jagermeister herbal liqueur  
1/2 oz Wild Turkey bourbon whiskey  
1/2 oz Goldschlager cinnamon schnapps  
1/2 oz DeKuyper Hot Damn cinnamon schnapps  
_Stir together in a short glass, and serve.

Fucked on the Floor - collins glass  
_2 oz vodka  
2 oz triple sec  
1 oz Malibu coconut rum  
1 oz peach brandy  
1 splash cranberry juice  
1 splash lemon juice  
2 splashes orange juice  
2 splashes pineapple juice  
_First, begin with 2 shots of vodka and triple sec in your glass. Then add 1 shot of peach brandy and Malibu coconut rum. Add 1 splash of lemon and cranberry juices. Next, add the 2 splashes of orange juice and top with 2 of pineapple juice. Mix well and serve on ice and you have a drink that everyone can enjoy.**  
**

All of the drinks were taken from . Yes, they all do exist. This began as a model story and ended as a bartender one. _**Tell me what you enjoyed, even if it's just one of the drinks!**_


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